The Ableist History of the Puzzle Piece Symbol for Autism

The puzzle piece is the most commonly recognized symbol for autism awareness. But many people are unaware of it’s ableist history. On World Autism Awareness Day (April 2nd) , many neurotypical people show support and spread “autism awareness” for their autistic family members and friends by displaying the puzzle piece ribbon, wearing puzzle piece pins, […]

The Ableist History of the Puzzle Piece Symbol for Autism

Remembering those lost in the World Trade Center attacks, 2001

It’s an appropriate time to reflect. Some sad occasions have happened in recent days for me, the death of a relative, a family friend, and a global public figure, though I will reflect on those experiences in a later post. The World Trade Center attacks were a formulative experience for me to witness. My memory is murky as the years go by, but each time the memory is revisited, I make more connections to those vignettes that still exist in my mind’s eye.

I was five years old, approaching six in four months. My parents were shopping for a new house in our city to make room for our new baby brother, who was then around nine months old. I had just started kindergarten, and my parents wanted to stay within the same school district. My sister was four, and she and I detested visiting open houses with them. Our brother could just sleep through them, but we had to walk around and try to admire stuff we didn’t understand. Our previous house had been sold before we’d picked a new one, so we stayed with my grandparents in the meantime.

There was this strange movie on television occasionally with burning buildings. My parents enjoyed action and detective stories, so I figured it was one of those. But my mother acted differently when this movie came on. She’d rush to turn it off or change the channel when she’d see it with us children in the room. My grandparents hosted visitors often, so sometimes my uncles, aunts, or adult cousins would come over and want to play this movie. I didn’t get the fuss. I’d sometimes watch Law and Order with my mom when I couldn’t sleep, but the violent parts were short and she’d cover my eyes. Why was this shot of burning buildings so long? Did this movie have any other scenes?

The day of the attacks was a Tuesday, which was a day off for kindergartners and a half day for the rest of my elementary school. My teacher briefly explained to us the following day that some bad people attacked our country with planes. I feel like I learned pretty early on some of these planes came from Boston, departing from Logan Airport, so several of the casualties were local to our metropolitan, but I can’t remember when exactly I learned this. But the day she informed us was otherwise an unremarkable day.

The repetition stuck with me. People said “never forget,” flew the American flag, and just generally exhibited nationalistic pride. But people did it outside of patriotic holidays like Veterans’ Day, Memorial Day, Flag Day, or Independence Day. I didn’t understand it. Over time, I heard the phrase “9/11,” and I’d be shown pictures of those towers that got burned in that movie I saw in kindergarten. Overtime, I realized I’d seen it. That was the real news at the time, not the fictitious news in some doomsday movie.

People began talking about censoring things. The Simpsons, a cartoon that tempted me but was forbidden to watch because it was not for kids, had a nuclear power plant in it that blew up sometimes, and over the years networks wanted those episodes shelved because they thought it insensitive to victims and their families. Around 2003 or 2004, my mother finally allowed us to watch this highly-acclaimed show, SpongeBob Squarepants, despite the fact she found it obnoxious. In an episode titled “Just One Bite,” which I felt to be a remake to Dr. Suess’ Green Eggs and Ham, SpongeBob’s cynical colleague Squidward proclaims his dislike for Krabby Patties, despite his never eating one. The first half of the episode has SpongeBob channeling Sam I Am, coaxing Squidward into trying it in a multitude of different settings. Squidward finally caves, but…unlike Green Eggs’ protagonist, Squidward is too prideful to admit his fondness for it. He breaks into the Krusty Krab restaurant during off-hours and suffers two gasoline burns in each doorway in his pursuit. This is done in effort to avoid confronting SpongeBob about his desire for the sandwich.

Except…something was different in the episode around 2007 to 2010. I couldn’t place my finger on it, but it felt shorter and…maybe missing some kind of detail? I shrugged it off for several years, until I came across a Youtube video around 2015 titled “SpongeBob Just One Bite deleted scene”…it was the scene of Squidward getting injured by the gasoline bucket. It was strange. The episode premiered in 2001, during which time I was not allowed to watch it, but the offending scene remained in tact for approximately 10 years after the tragic events of 9/11. Nonetheless, its removal is still seen as aftermath for the occasion.

Similarly, music was scrutinized too. People were sensitive to certain metaphors like “you dropped a bomb on me,” “you light me on fire,” “you are electric,” etc. Lots of pieces in the hip-hop and rock genres were temporarily banned. Today, it seems some circles are warming back up to this kind of hyperbole and explicit displays, but others still seem to have a collective post-traumatic sensitivity of this aggression.

There’s a lot more thoughts I have on this occasion and may create followup posts, especially about the censorship and nationalistic escalations. Anyway, I will conclude to say never forget, and participate in the AmeriCorps day of service if you can to mark this occasion.

News media: please stop telling people to start Christmas shopping now.

We don’t need the reminder. Who cares about the supply chain backlog? We can make do with what *does* arrive, as faithful, moral people ought to do.

During the final quarter of the year last year, the narrative was support local businesses. While I recognize even local businesses are having supply chain issues, maybe consider finding retailers that are even more local. Wood, metals, plastics, foods, and all materials made within a 100-mile radius of your residence. Sold from a warehouse or storefront around the same.

The big brands are not necessarily the best brands. Nor are big brands who pretend to be small to fake authenticity. Big box stores and department stores, I curse you for issuing Black Friday previews now. Market demand is good, but not when your workforce is a skeleton crew of the mealiest variety. Especially when you represent a brand that used to stand for the common people. People who stand for practicality and quality. You’ve inherited an intense brand loyalty that cannot be sated because you’ve put your own storefronts up for sale and will make bank whether the retailer lives or dies. You are both the jury and executioner.

Circulating new goods just forebodes more climate disaster. Just thrift or hand-me-down.

In all, please stop harnessing a sense of urgency in something so small as materials. Climate, disease, and labor ethics…That’s what’s urgent.

That time SpongeBob threw a dig at a competing network, only not really

So I have a longer post about SpongeBob in the pipeline, but that’s still in development. Anyway, I just remembered this scene my siblings and I always thought was a fourth wall break or metacognitive brag.

Season 3, Episode 53a, titled “New Student Starfish,” follows SpongeBob and Patrick at a day in boating school. Initially, Patrick was eager to go jellyfishing, but SpongeBob had to attend class. Patrick is upset, so SpongeBob decides to allow Patrick to shadow him for the day at school. Mrs. Puff greets Patrick when they arrive and encourages him to introduce himself to the class, Nervously, he blurts “twenty-four!” The class laughs, but the lesson quickly resumes. SpongeBob, meanwhile, is still amused, and retorts to Patrick in a mock-whisper. “Hey, Patrick. I just thought of something even funnier than twenty-four…. Twenty-five!” Patrick, who’d already been snickering at his pride for his funny remark, then laughs harder, and SpongeBob follows.

I’m sure everyone is familiar with the scene, but I wanted to explain why I thought there was another layer to this joke. Twenty-four is pretty random for Patrick (although in a deleted scene this isn’t quite so, his eyes wandered around the class when he saw the page in the daily calendar was turned to 24). The other students laugh for their own reasons. Probably as background characters, they don’t give much thought of how they fit into this narrative. SpongeBob, however, does. He’s the titular character and wants to ascertain his dominance. In some metacognitive, denting-the-fourth-wall kind of way, I felt he knew 24 was the number combo used to select Disney Channel on our television remote. Of course, he too, still laughed at 24, because some Disney Channels shows are decent. He is a friendly competitor. However, he had to literally one-up this. He had to bring in a number that was better, funnier, and had more program selection. Thus, 25. But what is 25? Why, it’s the number combo used to select Nickelodeon on our TV remote!

I thought this joke was a shot at Disney Channel, how it’s comfortable and gives sizable amusement, but Nickelodeon outlasts this.

But as I got older, I realized the writing crew would never really do this purposely. When the episode was released, and increasingly more so today, the TV channel numbers vary widely. Disney Channel and Nick might have been 24 and 25, respectively, in my household, but they could have been 39 and 42 at my friend’s house only a few blocks away. They are programming details; writers don’t give them much mind. I don’t even know how vast my particular channel numbers spanned, but I know it wasn’t very much. I don’t think this joke was written specifically for viewers in this tiny suburb just south of Boston. Not to mention in this suburb with our particular cable package, providers, wiring, brand, or whatever other variables.

Still, at the same time, I like to think the hidden meaning was written just for us. This little coincidence made me think we were acknowledged.

Tribute to a beloved local business owner, John Magraw

In fall 2017, I was taking a course on journalism/new media and assigned to do a profile on a local business or attraction. Focus was especially given to places that had just opened, celebrated an anniversary, or preparing to close. I chose Unchained Pizza, a local takeout restaurant in my city that had reopened after shuttering for two years after severe snowfall collapsed their roof. I was fortunate enough to speak with John T. Magraw, the owner and general manager of the store. He was very kind and friendly to my family as well. I really appreciate people like him who are willing to speak with student journalists, despite the fact that many of these pieces we write are for the eyes of our professors, their teaching assistants, or classmates. Thus, articles like these are for very selective audiences and do not generate as much press (and therefore, consumers) as an interview with a big publication. Nonetheless, John treated this interview with much of the same respect as seasoned reporters from The Patriot Ledger or Boston Globe. Sadly, John passed away suddenly a few weeks ago, and I’m sharing this assignment in tribute to him. His establishment has remained closed since its owner’s demise, and its continuance is still in negotiation and undetermined. I hope John’s dream can be continued with the same panache and charm as what he brought to it. But more importantly, I pray for the solace of John Magraw’s family, friends, and colleagues. My words now or those from four years ago cannot change any outcomes, but I hope they show the world how he’d molded my own aspirations as well as his own. ~SD

Unchained Pizza Profile: Interview w/ John T. Magraw. October 4, 2017

Though the final days of summer loomed, the communities of West Quincy, Wollaston, East Milton and surrounding areas nonetheless found something triumphant as daylight hours dwindled—Unchained Pizza, a neighborhood cornerstone since 2010, had finally reopened.

The restaurant, located at 550 Adams Street in the West Quincy strip mall Adams Plaza, had been shuttered for two years after a top-heavy snow pile on the roof left the location unsafe for business in February 2015. The collapse additionally affected other businesses in the plaza, such as Dunkin’ Donuts, next door to Unchained to its left, and the UPS Store, adjacent on its right. The section was ultimately demolished and rebuilt, however, the section containing the plaza’s two other tenants, In Sync Center of the Arts and Walgreen’s, was saved with little need for renovations.

In the meantime, Walgreen’s customers were encouraged to visit their location on 418 Quincy Avenue in South Quincy. Those who desired a trip to Dunkin’ Donuts were directed towards the 545 Adams Street location in East Milton Square. Though it was not the only vendor who directed its patrons towards such area—the East Milton Post Office at 499 Adams Street provided UPS service to those who usually would have gotten it at Adams Plaza.

Though a majority of damage was composed toward the UPS location, Unchained was the last of the tenants to reopen after the snowfall. Walgreen’s and the In-Sync Center of the Arts reopened within a few months, with Dunkin’ Donuts returning shortly thereafter, coupled with the UPS store. John Magraw, owner of Unchained Pizza, suspects that notoriety of his neighbors provided swifter accommodations.

 “I feel a place like Dunkin’ Donuts, as a large chain, has a bit more pull and sway to reopen as opposed to a local pizza shop,” he said in a recent phone interview. He additionally noted that construction was done on an individual, store-by-store basis. He further cites insurance claims as an obstacle.

Eventually, progress prevailed after a year and a half. While Unchained still remained unable to utilize its Adams Street location, Magraw applied for a permit to open an alternate site on Morrissey Boulevard in Dorchester. The alternate location opened up in September 2016.

Additionally, frequenters were encouraged to sign up for the restaurant’s email newsletter. Once done, they were invited to VIP grand opening party at the new restaurant.

Though the approximate six-mile drive seemed burdensome for Quincy locals who are situated a few blocks away from Adams Plaza, “any port in the storm” seems an appropriate attitude for a community on the bay.

“People were going the Dorchester location until the Quincy one opened,” Magraw recalled. Indeed, community loyalty remains extraordinarily pronounced. The crowded dinner rush is noted, even as early as 5pm on a weekday.

Though pizza is the restaurant’s titular dish, other fare is quite prominent. Aidan DeBonis, a 16-year-old junior at Quincy High School, is especially keen on the macaroni and cheese bites.

“They’re so crispy, cheesy, and good,” he said.

Aidan’s father, Paul, works as a customer service agent at the MBTA. When he is positioned at any of the Quincy stations, he occasionally visits Unchained for lunch.

“I really like the salads there,” Paul said. “The chicken taco one especially. The chipotle ranch dressing is a nice touch.”

His daughters, Nora, 20, and Sheila, 21, are enthusiastic about trying every specialty pizza at its introduction. One of their favorites is the baja chicken, complete with chicken, bacon, and onions, garnished with a drizzle of barbeque sauce and chipotle dressing.

Their mother, Eileen Lawlor, is more simplistic. “I think a pizza should taste like a pizza,” she said. By this, she means the marinara and cheese should not be overpowered by other things.If given a choice between any specialty, she opts for the Margharita. Otherwise, single-topping is much more desired, with mushroom being her favorite.

Additionally, due to the success the restaurant had achieved during the five years prior to its hiatus, the definition of community became increasingly broad. Testimonials accumulated far and wide.

“We miss our favorite pizza place even though you don’t deliver to Hough’s Neck,” wrote Shirley B., a customer who resides in the southeast peninsula of the city, during the restaurant’s prolonged closure. “It’s worth the car trip for pick up. Hurry back.”

Though their customer base does not only span within the opposite ends of the city. The user locations of Yelp reviews alone provide some insight. A few hail from Boston, Brookline, Elmwood, Medford, Hingham, and Bridgewater. Though this list does not consider the reviews coming from out of state, such as Rochester, NY; Pasadena, CA; Medford, OR; or Pawtucket, RI. One visitor was even from Canada.

The owner notes a warm embrace from his usual customers despite the obstacles. One would never suspect the restaurant had been out of commission for so long.

“My biggest takeaway from all of this is that business has picked up again really quickly with little to no marketing,” Magraw said. After a brief of pause to consider, he reveals an admission. “Well, I suppose social media and word-of-mouth contributed, but that’s really it.”

Though business has restarted thus far with little official commemoration, there will eventually be a ribbon cutting, planned with assistance by the Quincy Chamber of Commerce. Further, the restaurant requires one last grill installation, which is currently in process.

“As of now, we’re really trying to master what we’ve got going on and focus on the necessities,” Magraw asserted.

Unchained Pizza is located along the Furnace Brook, at the corner of Adams Street and Alrick Road. For further information, visit unchainedpizza.com.

You are never too fortunate to ask for emotional help.

I dedicate this to anyone who thinks their wealth, health, or success negates them from seeking counsel or psychotherapy.

Maybe you live or originate in developing land. Many areas are stricken with poverty or conflict. You, however, are wealthy. You come from wealthy elders, and are able to travel, maybe even outside your origins. You are educated, and see beyond dated tradition. You may still be faithful, but added nuances like procreation, diets, lifestyle, or appearance aren’t imperative to being such. Likewise, you are still aware of the strife that surrounds you, and while you haven’t experienced it, your friends and neighbors may have had to deal with it. You are sorry for them, and do sometimes worry about this. Maybe you even had a brush of misfortune. The family business almost had to be sold, you almost had to go into foster care, you were nearly hit by an explosive, you had a pregnancy scare, you were betrothed to a wealthy, untoward acquaintance, but you were lucky and got out of it.

Still, even though it didn’t happen to you, or even though it happened to someone else near you, it still hurts. You still deserve counselling, empathy, and solace. Please don’t think you’re too rich, too wealthy, too successful, too able, or too non-marginalized for therapy. You still deserve contentedness and love.

Hi

I miss you. Still do. Always will. Would be easier if I didn’t, and we both know it. But here we are.

I still wish you the best, and I hope you do the same for me. Hope we can reconnect one day. Whenever that day may be. But work on yourself. I won’t be in your way now.

Don’t be afraid of how we left things. I was hurt by you, but I hold no grudge for it. I did apologize for what I’ve done several times. I know you accepted, but my actions still haunt and upset you. But don’t let that cloud your perception of me and all the good memories we shared.

I still love you and I support you.

Interviewing employees from struggling, bankrupt, or defunct retail companies

As I may have written about here, I worked in a struggling department store within the last two years, and when applying for other jobs, prospective employers would often get distracted by my company’s name and the recent turmoil it had endured.

I’m working on an article that will be featured on Medium about what I wish employers knew when interacting with employees of our background and connections, and how they can make us more comfortable opening up about our skills. In short, using my perspective, I want to help people be better bosses, leaders, and recruiters instead of overwhelming us with complaints or perspectives we’ll all heard before.

Does anyone have any advice about stuff I should mention? Also, please get in touch if you’d like to be interviewed. I am also going to tag some companies which I will have in mind as I write this.