The problem with summer

For all my summers between academic years at college, I’ve desired to enhance myself academically and/or professionally, though my wish never comes to fruition.

I’ve kept myself too busy with work I am not enthusiastic about and save the things I want to do for later, once I’m no longer busy with work.

But this is to no avail. Once my work winds down, so does everything else. The essay contests, study abroad applications, or literary submission deadlines are all past due. I could write for the school paper, though they don’t publish throughout the summer.

I wanted to take a summer course, but the one I wanted wasn’t offered. I could have done an internship, but I’d need to consult with my major’s department in order to see I was getting academic credit. Also, I’d prefer an internship that paid, especially if the hours were longer. I can utilize 6-10 hours a week or so to give voluntary assistance, but if I’m spending anymore time there I’d like to be compensated.

In all, I feel so unprepared and powerless. For now, I guess I could freelance. Pitching ideas to a few publications in hopes that they’d like it. After all, writing is one of the few things in which I excel. Drawing is another one, but words flow more easily. Probably because words can depict the abstract nouns–virtue, love, desire, friendship, etc.

But I need to figure out my life. All throughout college I’ve been doing my homework, going to work, and then goofing off in all else.

I need to get published. I need to dedicate my time to something I care about. I need to display my value to others. I need to be an asset. Sitting around won’t get me anywhere.